5 Types of Neighbors That Only Exist In Movies and Music Videos
Have you ever wondered whether these “movie” neighbors exist in real life?
Movies and music videos are a nice escape from reality. However, nowadays, it seems like the movies and music videos are going to take over real life. Look around; talk about the choice of dressing, the lifestyles, the way people talk, and just normal day to day stuff. You can tell there is a lot of semblance to what we see in the movies. Away from that entire make-believe world, are there neighbors that we see in movies that actually exist in real life?
I would be surprised to hear someone admit that these 5 types of neighbors exist in real life.
1. The Hot gardener
We have all seen this character in the movies; a hot neighbor who always has a reason to mow the lawn wearing a skimpy top or just shirtless altogether (for the guys). Somehow, the sun is always hot AF. Why are they always oily and sweaty though? Ni kimbo mtu amejipaka nini?
In the movie scenes, there is always a hot gardener. He is well built, his hair is perfect, and he looks like he can totally gerrit. If it’s a woman, she always has those shorts that leave little to the imagination. She has a face that male neighbors like to call her “fwine.” Do you notice how hot gardeners in movies make gardening look doable and fun?
Instead, what we have in real life is that neighbor who loves wearing that hat that always makes one look twenty years older than they are. The typical gardener loves gardening with a Jembe and for some reason, there is always a wheelbarrow; not those Bungoma-sh. 100,000-types; just a normal wheelbarrow. Gardening ain’t easy y’all and No, I have not come across a hot-gardener neighbor.
2. The girl who always likes to stay topless in the bedroom window or swimming pool
In movies, there is always this girl who loves showing off her bon-bons “unawares.” There is always a fisi watching her through the window. It’s like the girl never cares and makes it a norm to be basking in the sun with no shirt or top on. In reality, Kenyans are quite conservative. You are not going to find a topless girl swimming. But, things are changing. Some people have started acting “liberated.”
I once saw a woman probably in her 30’s jumping up and down the deep-end of a swimming pool in a restaurant. Her bob-bons kept coming out and she seemed oblivious to it. She would come out of the pool and dry herself down while her naked upper body was in full view of every one; including kids. It was quite nasty. It was so awkward that the manager had to come and tell her to cover up her body.
3. The neighbor who loves bringing over pie
In movie scenes, we see that neighbor who loves bringing over pie or cookies to a new neighbor as a way of welcoming them to the neighborhood. In reality, has anyone ever brought you anything to welcome you to the new neighborhood? Even something as simple as chapati? WaKenya kitu ya kwanza ni kukuchunguza.
4. The noisy sex addicts
This one is quite common in the movies. In movies, there is always a scene where characters hear their next door neighbors “doing the nasty” and have to cover up the kid’s ears. In reality, especially here in Kenya, when you see a dude and a girl get in to the house the next thing that follows is loud music; except for Mollis. Mollis will go ahead and record it, now won’t he? You will hardly hear sex noises. Even for married Kenyan couples, romping is like top secret business.
5.The Fisi and Fisilet
In movies, Fisis and fisilets are in the gazillions! In the movies, a guy will walk up to a woman getting ready to leave for work and ask if he can take the girl out; and she says yes! Guys there have it easy, don’t they? Try walk up to a Kenyan woman leaving for work; ndio utajua kumbe movie hudanganya, the face you will get!
On the other hands, a fisilet in movies will walk up to a guy and write her numbers on the guy’s palm. Somehow, they always have a felt pen and not a biro; what are the odds! Guys should share their experiences about fisilets. It’s common and it’s happening, but movies still take the trophy in this one.